When my husband came out to me as polyamorous he sent me all of these books to read, and podcasts I could listen to, he was really excited, how could I not see why this isn’t the most amazing thing ever? It’s supposed to make my life easier too! I could have another woman around to help with the burden of maintaining the home!
It’s been years now. This blog is my therapy, working though everything that Polyamory has put on my plate. If you’re looking for a cheerleader to tell you this is good and it makes everyone happy, you’re in the wrong place, there are many books and podcasts and blogs out there happy to blow smoke up your ass. I’m not going to do that. I just want to be real and raw and share what I have learned though all of this, and maybe just maybe you’ll find your peace in all of this. There is a whole lot of poly gaslighting out there, that I just don’t have the patience for. Books like “More than Two” teaching people how to weaponize their autonomy. Even the author had been found out afterwards to be an abuser and shared stories in his book without seeking permission from the people he told real stories about.
Love is supposed to feel good right? Its supposed to bring up all the good things in your life and yet this lifestyle of maintaining “many loves” feels like the opposite. So what gives?
Here is where the rubber meets the road, Polyamory is valid. Polyamorous people should feel loved too, I have to believe that they aren’t out hurting people for their own gain for fun? They genuinely want to feel loved and love, and they don’t want to hurt their partners in pursuit of being authentic.
There is a whole lot that I plan to unload here that is not applicable to people who enter into a relationship with someone who is polyamorous and had the opportunity to consent to that commitment from them. What I unload here, is specifically about the relationship or the marriage that opens up, especially if this wasn’t just a marriage or a relationship but 2 people who have created a family together.
If that resonates with you? Stick around! If it doesn’t then I bless you and release you to your life and whatever you choose to welcome into your reality.
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